One day I was in Orem and I picked up a ride for about $25 going north. I thought, that’s a pretty good ride to Salt Lake payment wise. I was excited to take it. They don’t give you very good foresight as to where you’re going just a quick view of a small map and I really didn’t have time to focus on it but I accepted it.
I picked up this young lady over by Geneva Road and when we started to move, I saw where she was going. Mantua ,Utah! I don’t know how many of you know where Mantua is. Most people know it as the place where they get pulled over between Brigham City and Logan. The Mantua cop is infamous and persistent.
I thought,oh my goodness, that’s not so great for $25. One thing you know is from far that away there won’t be a ride coming back so that’s about three hours for $25 and a less than desirable trip.
I sat there there feeling sorry for myself for a moment over having roped myself into this ride. I heard the words, she needs your help. I looked in the mirror and what I saw or at least my first impressions of what I saw were a 35-year-old woman who had clearly been worn by life.
The spirit came over me and I felt great compassion for her. I thought about how hard life had apparently been to her. Little did I know many of my initial suppositions were wrong, as they tend to be when we rely on our eyes and not the Lord‘s eyes.
I did know, however, that she needed my help so we started to talk. Right off the bat she said that she was a student at UVU. This took me by surprise. I asked how was it hanging out with all of those young kids.
The look on her face let me know I had stepped in the mud a little bit. She said, I’m 25 so there’s not that much difference in age. Inside I was shocked and I tried not to let my face betray my feelings. I said, in an attempt to recover from my previous gafe, yeah but freshman are 18 How is it dealing with freshman. We took that and ran with it. I felt like I dodged a bullet.
Early on in my life I sold insurance and I learned that if you had to guess an age you guess 10 years below what you think they are. Why didn’t I apply that principle in this situation? It would’ve made the start of this conversation a lot easier. We went with the how is it dealing with 18-year-olds.
She said they were crazy but in her life she had grown out of her crazy faze. I asked, what was your crazy faze? She answered, I was a drug addict and an alcoholic from the time I was about 15 until I was 21.
She said, those years beat me up. I found a program and I got sober and clean. I’ve been sober and clean for four years now and I’m a counselor at that same rehab where I got sober.
I said, that’s great! I’ll bet you provide great insight and help. She said, it helps me maintain the principles that helped me with my sobriety and yes, I get to help other people. We talked for a few minutes about the concepts and program that they had.
I mentioned to her that my parents had served an addiction recovery mission. I said, it was their third mission and they really enjoyed helping people in the biggest fight of their lives.
As I was saying this, I received an impression that this young woman had grown up in the church. I felt she had been abused and discarded. I felt that she had been taught by those around her to blame the church and its leaders for her situation. I felt that this hurt little girl had fallen in with people who had an agenda that pulled her away from the church. She had got in with this bad crowd and acted out to find acceptance and camaraderie. From that point on it was a steady decline.
As I had these thoughts, the spirit told me to share them now. As I began to think in my mind how to formulate the words I was going to say based on the revelation I had received, I looked in the mirror and I no longer saw a 35-year-old woman. I saw a daughter of my father in heaven who had been pulled away and knew that he wanted her back. She needed help.
I asked her if she believed in miracles. She said yes. I asked her if she believed that God works through one person to help another. She said, I see it every day. I asked her if she would mind me sharing some impressions I had from the spirit. She said, I’m not Mormon anymore. I asked, well, do you mind if I share my impressions? She said, go ahead.
This was not a robust invitation but it opened the door and I walked through. I said, when we were baptized, we got what’s called the gift of the Holy Ghost. I asked, do you remember when you got the gift of the Holy Ghost? She said, yes. I was a Mormon but I don’t believe in that anymore. She said, I can tell you are a Mormon. You just have that feel to you.
I said, I’m glad I have that feel to me. I call it the spirit. The Holy Ghost can walk with us and help us make good decisions. I said, the Holy Ghost can comfort and lift us. The Holy Ghost can tell us things that we need to know to help other people and that’s where I got these impressions I want to share with you. She said, OK.
I repeated back to her the things about her life that I have previously written a couple of paragraphs above. Upon finishing, this girl who had been quite chatty was quiet. She didn’t say a word. I wondered if the darkness of my comment had offended her.
In my discussion of my prompting, I told her that I believed that at least some of the people who had abused and discarded her were church members, leaders, and family who are members of the church. I told her that her friends had told her to blame those people and this had created a wall between her and them.
She said, that’s exactly right! I love that wall because no one should ever have to go through what they put me through! Her defiant tone caught me a bit off guard but I decided to press forward.
I’ve had a lot of experience in my life with people who refuse to let go of the bitter hatred they have for people who have harmed them. I mentioned this to her and told her that hatred can consume you sometimes. She said, it’s what pushes me through.
It gives me the intensity I need to live my life. I asked her if she ever got tired of having that hate in her heart. I shared a couple of stories with her of people that didn’t forgive and in the end it becomes a cancer. I talked about my great grandfather and how the most part of three generations have been destroyed because he wouldn’t drop it.
She said, well, I see that and I hear that but I’m not part of the forgive and forget, all is well crowd. I said, there’s a difference between forgiving and forgetting. I said, forgiveness is the eternal principle and forgetting is not.
I said, that’s where Jesus Christ comes in. She said, I don’t believe in Jesus Christ. I said, in your seven step program, don’t you confess a belief in God? She said, we believe in a higher power. Yes, I do believe in a higher power.
I asked her if she believed in Satan. She thought about it for a moment and said, I believe there are bad people so believing there is a Satan is not that hard for me. I said, I believe that there are evil people and that Satan is the inspiration behind everything they do that is evil. I asked, if Satan is pushing people to do bad things and you have felt that, who would be pushing people to do good things? I also believe you felt this good in your life. I said, it’s got to be so much more than a higher power!
She said, I never thought of it that way. I said, your father in heaven is a loving Heavenly Father and all good flows from him. When we are rebellious we are rebelling against him. When we do bad things, it is an offense to him.
I said, when those things were done to you as a child, that offended your father in heaven because he loves you. You are his daughter. Your spirit was with him for thousands of years and his heart broke for you.
When I testified of the love of her Heavenly Father, the spirit entered the car and she began to tear up. She said, I never thought of it like that. Why did he make me suffer if he loves me?
I said, he didn’t make you suffer. He gives each of us our agency. He doesn’t force us to do anything. If he did, we couldn’t grow and if he did, we couldn’t learn. Some people misuse their agency to do evil. They misuse their agency and listen to Satan. When they do, others suffer. It’s not God causing the suffering. It’s Satan and evil people inflicting that suffering.
She said, OK. I get that but how does that make it right? Why would God let people suffer? I said, this is one of the great questions that a lot of people ask and the good thing is there is an answer to it. She said, I’m all ears. I have seen a lot of people be damaged by that suffering.
I said, it’s all about Jesus Christ. Heavenly Father sent Jesus Christ to earth to make it all right. He suffered the atonement which gave him the power to lift us. Many times when we think about the atonement, we think about the resurrection and that is a huge part of it. Due to the fact that Jesus was resurrected, every person who ever lived will live again. They will all be resurrected.
He did so much more than that. He suffered for our sins, our infirmities, the injustice we face and the oppression we experience in our lives. Every horrible negative thing you have ever felt or you will ever feel was also felt by Jesus. His suffering was so great that he bled from every pore and God sent angels to him to strengthen him.
By suffering these things for us it makes it so that if we look to him, he can relieve our suffering. She said, how does that work? I said, when you have faith in Jesus Christ and you ask God to apply the atonement of Jesus Christ in your circumstance the power of the atonement enters your life and lifts your burden.
When you have sinned, it cleanses you of the spirituall effect of that sin. When we are sick or otherwise suffering, the power of the atonement of Jesus Christ can literally minimize our suffering.
I told her the story I heard from Elder Maxwell about the children in the cancer ward at the hospital when he was having his treatments. He talked about how painful these treatments were and how this pain was debilitating for many of the adults but the small children were happy and playing as if they weren’t even sick in many cases. He said, their parents were, in many cases, much worse off than the small children. He taught that this is because the small children have faith in Jesus Christ and are covered by his atonement whereas adults need to learn to seek the atonement of Jesus Christ to bless their lives.
I said, it works like this in my mind. When something bad happens to us Satan tells us to blame God and the church. Many times we do. Many times people are horrible animals and they do things they shouldn’t and Satan says, blame God but we know Satan is a liar.
God points to Jesus and says look to Christ and live. Through the power of the atonement of Jesus Christ, our burdens are lightened and we can have joy even in our darkest circumstance.
I said, it’s like if you had seven clear glasses and you filled them with different levels of Kool-Aid. Later decided you wanted them all to be even. What would you do? She said, take some from the one that was the most full and use it to make them even. I said, that’s how we look at it as human beings and that’s how Satan wants us to look at it. He wants you to think that you have to take from that person to give to the other but that’s not how Jesus does it. I said, through the atonement of Jesus Christ, he just comes in with a new pitcher of Kool-Aid and fills everyone to the top. He makes up the difference. When there’s an injustice, he makes up the difference by lifting us. When there’s unfairness he makes up the difference by lifting us. When we sin, he makes up the difference by lifting us. When there is illness, he makes up the difference and lifts us. If we look to him, we can live.
She said, wow, I never understood it like that. I said, that is why when people look to Christ, they are able to overcome things where before they were not able to do on their own. That is why the “higher power’ is a very important part of what you guys are doing and what you guys are teaching.
As you teach people to use the atonement of Jesus Christ ( higher power) to fight their addiction you also can free yourself from the bonds of anger and hatred by looking to the atonement of Jesus Christ.
The spirit was in the car and she had tears rolling down her cheeks. She asked, will that still work for me? I said yes. I asked her what she was feeling. She said, hope and relief. She said, I feel like a burden has been lifted from my shoulders. I said, that is what Jesus Christ can do. If you ask your father in heaven to bless you through the atonement of Jesus Christ, you can have your burdens lifted in a very real way. It can change the way you function and deal in your life.
I said, when you feel this, you know that you are feeling the spirit of your father in heaven and the things you are hearing are true. This is how we know when we are hearing truth. God testifies to our souls by sending his spirit and he has sent it here to be with us today. Today you know that these things are true. She nodded and said, you’re right! I feel like these things are true. I said, that is the spirit of God working with you.
She said, I love that! How do you keep it going? I said, you go to church and you take the sacrament. I asked her if she remembered taking the sacrament and she said yes. I said, during the sacrament, we remember Jesus Christ and his atonement and the blessing that it is in our life. I said, I believe it’s very key in our ability to access that power on a consistent basis.
She said, I’ve kind of been feeling lately that I needed to go to a church but I didn’t know how to do it. I didn’t know how to go about it. I said, God has been reaching out to you and he put you in my car today so that we could have this conversation. I told her that when she first got in I heard the spirit whisper to me that she needed help.
Your father in heaven knows who you are and he knows what you need. He knew that you needed to be lifted today. He knew that you needed to learn about Jesus Christ and the atonement. He knew that you needed to feel his spirit because it’s time to quit looking back and start looking forward.
I said, like I said before, you’ve had your experiences and you can move on from the hate and remember never to make those mistakes again. You can do all this without that heavy pain in your heart that you’ve been carrying around. She said, it’s so heavy.
I said, Satan teaches people to self medicate with alcohol and drugs. That is a counterfeit and he is a liar because it only drags you down to addiction and away from the grace of God through the atonement of his son Jesus Christ.
She said, you might as well go with the real thing instead of the counterfeit. She said, this is a change I need to make. I need to start looking forward and quit hating on the past. I said, with the love of your father in heaven and through the atonement of Jesus Christ you can make this happen. You can make that change and feel in your life like you do here tonight in the car. She said, I want that so much.
I asked her where she lived. She said she lived in Orem. She said she grew up in Mantua but that she lives and works in Orem. I said, well there are plenty of churches in Orem. We ought ta find one for you to go to this Sunday. She laughed and said, there are two like a block from my house.
We got on the meeting house locator and looked up her meeting time and her Bishop‘s name. I said, you need to go to church on Sunday and when you go, introduce yourself to the Bishop. I said, tell him that you are there to feel the spirit and access the atonement in your life. He will know what to do and how to help you from that point.
She said, that sounds like a great idea. Like I said, this is something I felt like I needed to do. I can’t believe how good it feels right now in my heart. This is a high I need to chase. I said, God will walk with you and bring you home. He will fill your heart with peace, love and joy through the atonement of Jesus Christ if you will allow him to do it.
I said, you need to pray and talk to your father often. I asked her how often she prayed and she said she hadn’t prayed since she was a little girl. I said, the good thing is you’re still your father in heaven‘s little girl and he’d love to hear from you. I said, pray at least a couple of times each day. I said, on my mission my Mission President told us to walk around all day with a prayer in our heart. I found that’s the best way for me to have the spirit with me.
I said, you need to read the Book of Mormon. I asked her if she had a Book of Mormon and she said no. I reached into my glove box and grabbed one of my Book of Mormon’s from the Secrists and gave it to her. I said, this is yours and you should read it. She said, I love to read, I will do that.
If you want to feel this spirit always you need to go to church. You need to get to the point where you can take the sacrament. If you do these things you will be filled and you will feel compassion and love in your heart where hatred used to be.
I said, just because you’re doing the right thing doesn’t mean that everyone around you will be perfect either. There will still be people that say things and do things that will offend you or upset you. They might judge you or make you feel uncomfortable. If they do, remember that you’re not here for them. Remember that you’re here for your father in heaven and your Savior Jesus Christ. Remember that you’re here for the cure which is the atonement.
I said, in the end that judgment is their sin and they need to repent of that. Don’t let things that people say determine what you do. She said, that’s good council. I know lots of people that talk about how judgmental other people are. I said, yeah, people are horrible animals but that’s why we have the atonement and that’s why we have repentance and forgiveness. That applies to those people too.
You take care of you and be a light and you’ll see that other people will follow. I said, imagine how much better you’ll be at your job of helping people if you have the light of Christ with you and the feeling of God’s spirit roundabout you like it is in the car tonight. If you have that, imagine how great you will be and how many people you’ll be able to help. She said, this is amazing and it’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to go to church on Sunday.
We had finally arrived in Mantua and I pulled up to the house where I was dropping her off. She asked if she could shake my hand and she said. I will pray tonight and thank God for sending you.
I’m glad he sent me too. Oh, by the way, the Mantua cop didn’t pull me over, which is also always a win.
